In school, we are studying how we are the image of God. This has been challenging me. I want to see as Jesus sees me, but that is the challenge I face. As a woman of God wanting to please Him and only Him, but be surrounding by a world who tries to pull me away.
I struggle mostly with my past and the things I have done! I have been ashamed for a long time! I thought God would never forgive me for some of the mistakes I have made! I thought I was worthless and God couldn't use me for ministry. I am a junior now in college and through three years I have struggled with this thought in the back of my mind, until this year, I have learned that I am forgiven, completely! God has shown me that I can turn those mistakes into triumphs! That I am a piece of the big picture of His kingdom!
So I guess my message is that we are humans,we will get messy and we will make mistakes, some big and some small. But no matter how big you think your sin is, God's grace and love for you is so much bigger! Some how the devil likes to make our sin shrink God, when in reality it's should really be the other way! I have realize that while my savior was dangling on the cross, bloody and beaten, He didn't died for only certain sins, HE DIE FOR ALL SIN! So I pray that for all of you who are reading this, to remember that when you sin, big or small, God knows, nothing shocks Him! But He loves you more than You will ever know! You may run 1,000 miles away from Him, but He will only be a step behind!
God is simply just amazing. I found out some more details of my birth and its just astounds me how great He is! My grandpa wrote this a couple days after my birth and this what it says,
I have never been a person who put much stock in miracles. Ten days ago a child was born into our family. This baby was give very little chance at life, She was given very little chance to arrive at the Twin Falls I.C.U. alive.
When she did arrive, she was suffering severe seizures, an ominous sign of brain damage. The doctor had told us that there was a 50-90% chance at significant brain damage. Since that morning, there have been no more seizures.
The baby's suck response developed normally, another miracle. The baby's kidneys were not functioning, they were healed without medication. The child had a severe water retention problem, this again was healed without medication. A problem with the child temperature regulation system, again healed spontaneously.
A young woman, who had made an appointment for an abortion, changed her mind after seeing this child's struggle for life, and moved by this body's love and prayers, That she canceled the appointment and will bear her child.
The baby is now out of the hospital and doing well. We wish to give our heartfelt thanks to ALMIGHTY GOD for all His blessings. We also want to thank Pastor Mike and all the church body for their prayers, love, and concern.
DON'T EVER DOUBT GOD IS ALIVE AND HE DOES DO MIRACLES!
This baby was me!!! When I read this I am just in Awe of God, He has saved my life so many times and it just fills my heart with love. I am 22 years old now and going to a bible college. I am hoping to glorify God with my whole life because He didn't do these miracles for nothing. I give my life to the one who gave me life! I hope this blesses you!
I have always planned to be a inspirational speaker. But I never knew specifically what I want to encourage people towards, I know Jesus, but there is so many ways that it could go. So I have been praying lately that God show me what His plan for me after college. And a couple days ago a thought had popped in my head and it kept building and it hasn't left me. I have always had a passion of speaking, the youth, and bullying.
So I want to build groups all over the United States for those who are being bullied and have counselors be able to talk to the kids one on one and in groups. Also, to get families who have lost a child from suicide to be able to get involved, whether they need help or donate or to be able to volunteer. And to have those who have done hate crimes and bullied kids to have to come into the groups and have to participated in the activities, so they can see the effects of their actions and also to be able speak with a family who has lost someone to bullying and let them tell their story and show how it ripples in effects. I also want to have something where it's not pressured but they can have the option of learning about Jesus. Also, to have a place where they can learn how special they each are and let them learn their own special talents and gifts to help build self esteem. The speaking part will be where I can go into the public schools and talk to them and encourage them and also to them about this group that is willing to help them.
I think this is desperately needed, they are so many people
who think, "Oh, it just a normal part of growing up." But it's getting
worse and worse everyday! There are so many kids out there today who feel hopeless and alone. Do you know every half hour some teenager commits suicide. I know I can't stop bullying, but I can help those who are being bullied! I know I will have to start small and it will take a lot of work, but it's work I am willing to do to further God's Kingdom. So please pray for me as I take on this adventure.
Tonight my mind is busy with worry! I am worried of how to pay for school like I always do about this time! I was praying and asking God to open a door like He usually does for me and then a verse popped in my head. Hebrews 13:8, Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever. But then I thought even though that is true, it never says that He is predictable. I am not sure what He has planned for me. But I have learned that where ever I am He's there, even in my dark days of life. And even though I might not going back to bible college and after the heartache of it, in the end I will survive!
It makes more sense of how our lives are unpredictable because our Creator is! He was so unpredictable that didn't even tell us when He was coming back, He just told us to be prepared! :) I guess to understand this is to show us how truly small we are and we can't know it all! Knowing us humans, if we did know, we would probably find a way to screw something up! All I know is that He loves me, He always there whenever I need Him, and He has a plan for my life! Jeremiah 29:11, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to
prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
Lately, what been on my mind is the sincerity of our hearts when we worship or pray to God. Are we being like pharisees and showing people how good we are and then when we are alone, we do our sins in secret? Isn't the church a hospital for the broken instead of a museum for the good people. Shouldn't we boast in our weaknesses because that where God covers in His strength?
I have observe my own heart lately and prayed Lord, seek my heart and take things that shouldn't be there! I have found things in my own self and I have realized I do act like a pharisee in some ways. I want to show others Jesus, but sometimes I can take it to far.
I just thank God He has more grace and mercy on me then I do on others sometimes. He has to humble me multiple times to show me that I am only where I am because of Him alone! I don't earn nothing from Him because He has already earned it for me! And to remember that Jesus despised the pharisee and blessed the humble. Here's a few scriptures where Jesus talks to the Pharisees in Matthew 23
Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside they are full of greed and self-indulgence. 26 Blind Pharisee! First clean the inside of the cup and dish, and then the outside also will be clean.27 “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of the bones of the dead and everything unclean.28 In the same way, on the outside you appear to people as righteous but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness.29 “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You build tombs for the prophets and decorate the graves of the righteous.30 And
you say, ‘If we had lived in the days of our ancestors, we would not
have taken part with them in shedding the blood of the prophets.’31 So you testify against yourselves that you are the descendants of those who murdered the prophets. 32 Go ahead, then, and complete what your ancestors started! 33 “You snakes! You brood of vipers! How will you escape being condemned to hell?
Also Jesus tells the Parable of the Pharisee and the Publican in Luke 18:9-14, 9 To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everyone else, Jesus told this parable:10 “Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector.11 The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people, robbers, evildoers, adulterers,or even like this tax collector.12 I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’13 “But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’14 “I
tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified
before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and
those who humble themselves will be exalted.”
So humble yourself before the Lord and remember no matter how good you've done, Jesus has done greater!
This world has so many labels to put on others, too skinny, too fat, too nerdy, too preppy! To tell the truth I am sick of all the labels, I have lived with them all of my life, and they try put me to a level where they tell me, I can't have a normal life because I am disabled, And I also have people in my life who judge me on my body size.
But my question is who gave them the right to tell me who I am and how I should look like? Who has the right to judge on whether something is beautiful or not, or someone can or can't do something? Isn't it God? He is the One who created me! Shouldn't He have the right to tell me who I am in His eyes!? I guess through the process of it all I have learned that the world's opinion doesn't matter, it like a vapor.
I mean I am still human and a girl, I have days where I do not feel beautiful, I hate the way I talk sometimes, and sometimes I do feel like giving up. I am aware of my flaws, I don't need to be remind of them, for I know I am not perfect. Sometimes I talk too much, when I need to listen, I am not a size 5, I am a size 15. I have Cerebral Palsy, I talk and write different, but God has shown His strength through my weaknesses. I have flaws where I am still learning. BUT EVEN THOUGH ALL OF MY FLAWS, I AM BEAUTIFUL EVEN WHEN THE WORLD TELLS ME I NOT! I KNOW MY CREATOR LOVES ME AND HE CREATED ME IN HIS IMAGE AND THAT DROWNS OUT THE SOUNDS OF THE WORLD! I BELONG TO HIM!
Tonight, I am sitting in my 1st apartment's living room, knowing that tomorrow (actually today) I am leaving back home for the summer, not knowing what's going to lead and what going to happen, the only thing I know is that God is in charge. I did my best at school and now God is in charge.
This is one of the moments where you're happy, but sad. The people you have met and try to invest your heart into has come to an end and you wish that even though you showed them your flaws that you also shown them Christ. But I am happy because it's time to go back to the people whom love me most, no matter what I do, they are always gonna be by my side loving me through the good and bad!
I have learned a lot this year looking back, I have learned to let go of the little things and the big things! I have learn that I don't need a big fancy diploma to make a big difference in the world, I have Jesus Christ and that's all I need. I learned to live for today, not tomorrow, I learned that laughter is truly the best medicine. But mostly importantly I learned that God truly has a plan for me and every second that plan is in motion. So even though it's hard to say goodbye, I know that it's not a end, it's just another beginning! :) Get ready world, here I am come!
Lately the question has been in my head, Why do bad things happen to good people? And if I could give you a theological answer, I would tell you that there is no such thing that exists as a good person, for all have sinned. But there are sometimes where you question certain things. Do you know every half hour some teenager committed suicide and in general, every 40 seconds someone attempts or commits suicide. This world, as you can see, is so broken and every where you look there is someone that is hurting.
In today's world, I think we are harder on ourselves then people are on us. We get so lost in the lies the devil tells us, that it's all our fault, we are not worth anything, and anything that he can tells us to pull us down he will. It's so easy to get lost in the sea of this world, that sometimes we just become so numb from everything that life has handed us. When need to be aware of this for in 1 Peter 5:8 it says, "Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour."
When you look at the statistics above, you might think, well, Satan obviously winning! But you would be wrong because we need to remember that Jesus already defeated death. The battle is won through Him! He's always with us and it's never too late to run back in His arms! When you have these days of doubt just remember that you are worth more then you could ever know! You are royalty! The most beautiful thing, created in the image of the God who made the stars, the mountains, the oceans, the sunrises and the sunsets!
I meant to post this earlier, but now is okay. We all recently just celebrated Easter, every Easter, I have a moment of just awe of how amazing Jesus really is! I still wondered how he could die for my sins and find me worthy enough to die for me, but not only that but to choose me and then use me to proclaim His name. I saw this video and i think it sums up just how great He is!
Watching that video and then thinking that this king is my king leaves me in awe! But not only the He died the most humiliating, cruel death in all of history so that we could live and not only just live, but to live to the fullest! Thank you Jesus! You are so wonderful!
So every time your feeling down and ready to give up, remember there is someone that loves with a love with that can complete every person who accepts it! And He is the King of kings, the Lord of all lords! And He got whipped, spat on, his beard pulled out, and a crown seep into His skull for you!
You know how you have one of those days where you are trying to serve God and Satan comes along to remind you of your past. Everything you have done wrong, every mean thing you have done and said, every thought that has been through your mind, and he brings you to a level that you don't feel worthy to even be saved by Jesus, because your past is too dirty.
Well, I am having one of those days, where I want to serve God with all my being and everything is being thrown at me at once, It kinda reminds me of what my grandma told me, "Satan is only gonna attack you if he finds you a threat!"I have to remind myself of that, more then I should. But then I also come to a thought when these things do come, why do we hide, and treat grace as if it were cheap and that our sins shrinks it, when in all actuality it grows grace all that more, when we come into repentance. God had known already that we were going to commit that sin and He still sent His only Son to die on the cross. So when we become believers in Christ, shouldn't we see that we our no longer in the bondage of sin, we are free! Free! Why aren't we acting like it and telling everyone we know that we are FREE!
Roman 8:1-4says, "Therefore, there is now NO condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you FREE from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do because it was weakened by the flesh, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh to be a sin offering.And so he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fully met
in us, who do not live according to the flesh but according to the
Spirit."
I feel so blessed! Oh how God loves me and how He helps in me, no matter where I am in life, I feel Him with me, right by my side. I heard this song tonight, and it said every word that I was feeling tonight, so that is what I am gonna put on my blog and just leave it to that!
My disability is so many things that no one will understand unless they have one. I remember as a kid I felt trapped inside of a body that no one could fix, as I got disgusted looks, laughing and pointing, mocking. every time I drooled I would try to cover it up before anyone saw and then if they did see something, I try to avoid looking at them because I even was disgusted with myself.
It's frustrating when you want to look normal, but your not, you want to sound normal but you don't and no matter what you do you will always have these flaws, maybe when I am old and gray I will understand fully why God made me this way and there are some days where I can see glips of it! But there are other days that I just wish that I could be without a disability.
I know God has a plan for me, maybe its to show ignorant people and open their eyes of what they can't see. I just so glad my God is a God, who is in love with the weak and let's them lead the strong because He knows that the weak know that they can't do it themselves, they need Him!
I AM WEAK, I HAVE CEREBRAL PALSY, I DROOL, AND LET'S FACE IT, I TALK WEIRD, AND I WRITE FUNNY! I AM NOT A BEAUTY QUEEN, I AM NOT PERFECT, I HAVE FLAWS! AND SOMETIMES I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY, BUT IN THE MIST OF ALL OF IT, I SEE GOD IS WORKING AND IF I COULD SAY SOMETHING TO MY DISABILITY, I WOULD SAY THIS, THERE ARE SOME DAYS THAT I HATE YOU, I HATE THE SLOWNESS AND SHAKINESS OF MY HANDS! BUT EVEN IN THESE DAYS, I KNOW MY GOD IS GREATER THAN YOU AND HE HAS A PLAN FOR ME AND SOMEHOW YOU BRING HIM GLORY MORE THAN I EVER COULD, SO I THANK YOU BECAUSE THAT'S ALL I WILL EVER WANT IS TO BRING MY SAVIOR GLORY!
.....Therefore, in order
to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a
messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I PLEADED with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My GRACE is SUFFICIENT for you, for MY POWER is made PERFECT IN WEAKNESS.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my WEAKNESSES, so that CHRIST'S POWER may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I DELIGHT in WEAKNESSES, in INSULTS, in HARDSHIPS, in PERSECUTIONS, in DIFFICULTIES. FOR WHEN I AM WEAK THEN I AM STRONG!!! 2 Corinthians 12:7-12
Lately, I have been thinking if there is a soul mate (so you called it) for everyone. And then you wonder if there is, and then you wonder who and when and how? You bring all these questions to your mind. I know God has made us to be in community. I get in this mode of trying to rush through this world and then God
reminds me to step back, take a breath and enjoy! I
catch myself sometimes want to find that special someone who will
accepted me for me and I can have special moments with, laugh with, talk
to, and will become my best friend. I hope the someday a meet that
special man that will one day become my husband.
As a single person, society has made singleness a bad thing, that you need that other person to be completely fulfilled. But maybe singleness is not so bad, it less distractions, you can see clearer. You have more time on your hands.Shouldn't we take advantage of every stage of our lives? If you single, enjoy it! If your married, Enjoy it! If you are a brand new parent, enjoy it! Why is this world in such a rush all time?
1 Corinthians 7:32-35 says, "I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about
the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is
anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests
are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the
things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married
woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. I say
this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to
promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.?
I am just going to enjoy my singleness until that day when I meet that man! I am take this
opportunity and have this personal relationship with Jesus and get as close as I can with Him, so
when that day does come, I will be ready for my future husband. I don't want the
worldly love, I want a love where God is the center of it because that's
true love! I want love not lust! I know this may take longer then it
could normally be, but I rather wait and have a relationship that lasts
then to rush and have a relationship end short because we didn't wait! I
don't want to based my relationship on feelings, I want to based it on
God! I want to love the way that God has called me to love not the way
the world loves.
Have you been ever curious on what God has hold for your future, Who are you to marry, what job to get, how many kids will you have? I have! And I have come to the conclusion that maybe God doesn't want me to worry about that for He has those things in His hands, but to worry about what is now, the present and how to make a difference in this world now . So many time I have told myself, "oh, I will make a difference after college. But then God reminds me that, I don't know when my last breath is and the time is not later, its now! Everyday I breathe should be involved with changing or effecting someone's life in a positive way!
I never really realized how much impacted I have, until God brings someone or something that reminds me that I am! I do have a voice in this huge world! Especially with God by my side, I am unstoppable! We forget that! In 2 Timothy 1:7-12 says, "For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline. So do not be ashamed of the testimony about our Lord or of me his
prisoner. Rather, join with me in suffering for the gospel, by the power
of God. He has saved us
and called us to a holy life not because of anything we have done but
because of his own purpose and grace. This grace was given us in Christ
Jesus before the beginning of time,
but it has now been revealed through the appearing of our Savior,
Christ Jesus, who has destroyed death and has brought life and
immortality to light through the gospel. And of this gospel I was appointed a herald and an apostle and a teacher.
That is why I am suffering as I am. Yet this is no cause for shame,
because I know whom I have believed, and am convinced that he is able to
guard what I have entrusted to him until that day.
Isn't a good feeling when you are so happy that you can feel the love the surrounds you and you embrace everything that you see in nature and you just smile because you see just how beautiful Your Creator truly is. You realize just how blessed you are, no matter how bad things seem to be Jesus is so good and that covers it! I am truly blessed, God has love me through everything I have and will go through.
Jesus, my prayer is not to ask You for anything, but just to say thank you! Thank you for my wonderful family, my friends who have accepted me with open arms, food, water, a bed, a roof over my head, education, but most of all, thank You for YOU! Thank you for Your grace and mercy upon me! You are wonderful, amazing, and beautiful! Thank you for letting me serve You! You are mine and I am Yours! Thank You!
Living everyday is hard, you look at every face and you know that every person you look at is going through something, maybe even worse than what you yourself is going through. Yet we seem to be too busy, too occupied with our own problems to realize the hurting. As a Christian, I seem to miss what God had call me to do in the first place, I miss the hurting people. He tells me to reach out for I have something that they don't have and that is Him!
There is so many people in this world, who think no one loves them. They go through life as their number one goal to find that love, that love that will quench that thirst, that completes them, that accepts them. I know what they are feeling because I was once where they were, thinking that a guy could give me all that I needed. But here's what we forget people are people, they fall, and get messy, and fail us, and break our hearts. But their is One that will never fail us, never leave, and will always love us, no matter how messy out life gets, His name is Jesus Christ!
So, my prayer is that Jesus, I am Your servant, my hope is to become
more and more like you, through mistakes and the messiness of my life.
Please, give me your eyes, Jesus. Show me where to go when I can't see
it myself, lead me in Your ways, and keep me on Your path. I need You
desperately everyday. You are my rock and my number one. I will follow
You all the days of my life, and I know it won't be easy, but Lord, I
couldn't imagine it without You. Your grace, love, peace, joy, goodness.
I couldn't even try, for I would fail. I wish I could show every single
person how much they are loved, but I am just a person like them, so I
need You, only You can show them, not me. I just play the background,
just another tool in the tool box. And what a privilege it is to work
beside the KING OF KINGS AND LORD OF LORDS! I am amazed that you even
chose me! Thank you
