Weakness

My disability is so many things that no one will understand unless they have one. I remember as a kid I felt trapped inside of a body that no one could fix, as I got disgusted looks, laughing and pointing, mocking. every time I drooled I would try to cover it up before anyone saw and then if they did see something, I try to avoid looking at them because I even was disgusted with myself.

It's frustrating when you want to look normal, but your not, you want to sound normal but you don't and no matter what you do you will always have these flaws, maybe when I am old and gray I will understand fully why God made me this way and there are some days where I can see glips of it! But there are other days that I just wish that I could be without a disability.

I know God has a plan for me, maybe its to show ignorant people and open their eyes of what they can't see. I just so glad my God is a God, who is in love with the weak and let's them lead the strong because He knows that the weak know that they can't do it themselves, they need Him!

I AM WEAK, I HAVE CEREBRAL PALSY, I DROOL, AND LET'S FACE IT, I TALK WEIRD, AND I WRITE FUNNY! I AM NOT A BEAUTY QUEEN, I AM NOT PERFECT, I HAVE FLAWS! AND SOMETIMES I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY, BUT IN THE MIST OF ALL OF IT, I SEE GOD IS WORKING AND  IF I COULD SAY SOMETHING TO MY DISABILITY, I WOULD SAY THIS, THERE ARE SOME DAYS THAT I HATE YOU, I HATE THE SLOWNESS AND SHAKINESS OF MY HANDS! BUT EVEN IN THESE DAYS, I KNOW MY GOD IS GREATER THAN YOU AND HE HAS A PLAN FOR ME AND SOMEHOW YOU BRING HIM GLORY MORE THAN I EVER COULD, SO I THANK YOU BECAUSE THAT'S ALL I WILL EVER WANT IS TO BRING MY SAVIOR GLORY!

.....Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me.  Three times I PLEADED with the Lord to take it away from me.  But he said to me, “My GRACE is SUFFICIENT for you, for MY POWER is made PERFECT IN WEAKNESS.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my WEAKNESSES, so that CHRIST'S POWER may rest on me.  That is why, for Christ’s sake, I DELIGHT in WEAKNESSES, in INSULTS, in HARDSHIPS, in PERSECUTIONS, in DIFFICULTIES.   FOR WHEN I AM WEAK THEN I AM STRONG!!! 2 Corinthians 12:7-12