Free

You know how you have one of those days where you are trying to serve God and Satan comes along to remind you of your past. Everything you have done wrong, every mean thing you have done and said, every thought that has been through your mind, and he brings you to a level that you don't feel worthy to even be saved by Jesus, because your past is too dirty.

Well, I am having one of those days, where I want to serve God with all my being and everything is being thrown at me at once, It kinda reminds me of what my grandma told me, "Satan is only gonna attack you if he finds you a threat!"I have to remind myself of that, more then I should. But then I also come to a thought when these things do come, why do we hide, and treat grace as if it were cheap and that our sins shrinks it, when in all actuality it grows grace all that more, when we come into repentance. God had known already that we were going to commit that sin and He still sent His only Son to die on the cross.  So when we become believers in Christ, shouldn't we see that we our no longer in the bondage of sin, we are free! Free! Why aren't we acting like it and telling everyone we know that we are FREE!

Roman 8:1-4says, "Therefore, there is now NO condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you FREE from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do because it was weakened by the flesh, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh to be a sin offering.And so he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the flesh but according to the Spirit."

Trampoline

I feel so blessed! Oh how God loves me and how He helps in me, no matter where I am in life, I feel Him with me, right by my side. I heard this song tonight, and it said every word that I was feeling tonight, so that is what I am gonna put on my blog and just leave it to that!

Thank you Jesus! I love You so much!

Weakness

My disability is so many things that no one will understand unless they have one. I remember as a kid I felt trapped inside of a body that no one could fix, as I got disgusted looks, laughing and pointing, mocking. every time I drooled I would try to cover it up before anyone saw and then if they did see something, I try to avoid looking at them because I even was disgusted with myself.

It's frustrating when you want to look normal, but your not, you want to sound normal but you don't and no matter what you do you will always have these flaws, maybe when I am old and gray I will understand fully why God made me this way and there are some days where I can see glips of it! But there are other days that I just wish that I could be without a disability.

I know God has a plan for me, maybe its to show ignorant people and open their eyes of what they can't see. I just so glad my God is a God, who is in love with the weak and let's them lead the strong because He knows that the weak know that they can't do it themselves, they need Him!

I AM WEAK, I HAVE CEREBRAL PALSY, I DROOL, AND LET'S FACE IT, I TALK WEIRD, AND I WRITE FUNNY! I AM NOT A BEAUTY QUEEN, I AM NOT PERFECT, I HAVE FLAWS! AND SOMETIMES I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY, BUT IN THE MIST OF ALL OF IT, I SEE GOD IS WORKING AND  IF I COULD SAY SOMETHING TO MY DISABILITY, I WOULD SAY THIS, THERE ARE SOME DAYS THAT I HATE YOU, I HATE THE SLOWNESS AND SHAKINESS OF MY HANDS! BUT EVEN IN THESE DAYS, I KNOW MY GOD IS GREATER THAN YOU AND HE HAS A PLAN FOR ME AND SOMEHOW YOU BRING HIM GLORY MORE THAN I EVER COULD, SO I THANK YOU BECAUSE THAT'S ALL I WILL EVER WANT IS TO BRING MY SAVIOR GLORY!

.....Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me.  Three times I PLEADED with the Lord to take it away from me.  But he said to me, “My GRACE is SUFFICIENT for you, for MY POWER is made PERFECT IN WEAKNESS.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my WEAKNESSES, so that CHRIST'S POWER may rest on me.  That is why, for Christ’s sake, I DELIGHT in WEAKNESSES, in INSULTS, in HARDSHIPS, in PERSECUTIONS, in DIFFICULTIES.   FOR WHEN I AM WEAK THEN I AM STRONG!!! 2 Corinthians 12:7-12

Love

 Lately, I have been thinking if there is a soul mate (so you called it) for everyone. And then you wonder if there is, and then you wonder who and when and how? You bring all these questions to your mind. I know God has made us to be in community. I get in this mode of trying to rush through this world and then God reminds me to step back, take a breath and enjoy!  I catch myself sometimes want to find that special someone who will accepted me for me and I can have special moments with, laugh with, talk to, and will become my best friend. I hope the someday a meet that special man that will one day become my husband.

As a single person, society has made singleness a bad thing, that you need that other person to be completely fulfilled. But maybe singleness is not so bad, it less distractions, you can see clearer. You have more time on your hands.Shouldn't we take advantage of every stage of our lives? If you single, enjoy it! If your married, Enjoy it! If you are a brand new parent, enjoy it! Why is this world in such a rush all time?

1 Corinthians 7:32-35 says, "I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.?

 

 

I am just going to enjoy my singleness until that day when I meet that man! I am take this opportunity and have this personal relationship with Jesus and get as close as I can with Him, so when that day does come, I will be ready for my future husband. I don't want the worldly love, I want a love where God is the center of it because that's true love! I want love not lust! I know this may take longer then it could normally be, but I rather wait and have a relationship that lasts then to rush and have a relationship end short because we didn't wait! I don't want to based my relationship on feelings, I want to based it on God! I want to love the way that God has called me to love not the way the world loves.

What true love is!

The future vs. now!

Have you been ever curious on what God has hold for your future, Who are you to marry, what job to get, how many kids will you have? I have! And I have come to the conclusion that maybe God doesn't want me to worry about that for He has those things in His hands, but to worry about what is now, the present and how to make a difference in this world now . So many time I have told myself, "oh, I will make a difference after college. But then God reminds me that, I don't know when my last breath is and the time is not later, its now! Everyday I breathe should be involved with changing or effecting someone's life in a positive way!

 I never really realized how much impacted I have, until God brings someone or something that reminds me that I am! I do have a voice in this huge world! Especially with God by my side, I am unstoppable! We forget that! In 2 Timothy 1:7-12 says, "For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline. So do not be ashamed of the testimony about our Lord or of me his prisoner. Rather, join with me in suffering for the gospel, by the power of God. He has saved us and called us to a holy life not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace. This grace was given us in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time, but it has now been revealed through the appearing of our Savior, Christ Jesus, who has destroyed death and has brought life and immortality to light through the gospel. And of this gospel I was appointed a herald and an apostle and a teacher. That is why I am suffering as I am. Yet this is no cause for shame, because I know whom I have believed, and am convinced that he is able to guard what I have entrusted to him until that day.

So blessed!

Isn't a good feeling when you are so happy that you can feel the love the surrounds you and you embrace everything that you see in nature and you just smile because you see just how beautiful Your Creator truly is. You realize just how blessed you are, no matter how bad things seem to be Jesus is so good and that covers it! I am truly blessed, God has love me through everything I have and will go through.

Jesus, my prayer is not to ask You for anything, but just to say thank you! Thank you for my wonderful family, my friends who have accepted me with open arms, food, water, a bed, a roof over my head, education, but most of all, thank You for YOU! Thank you for Your grace and mercy upon me! You are wonderful, amazing, and beautiful! Thank you for letting me serve You! You are mine and I am Yours! Thank You!

Give me Your eyes, Jesus.

    Living everyday is hard, you look at every face and you know that every person you look at is going through something, maybe even worse than what you yourself is going through. Yet we seem to be too busy, too occupied with our own problems to realize the hurting. As a Christian, I seem to miss what God had call me to do in the first place, I miss the hurting people. He tells me to reach out for I have something that they don't have and that is Him!

     There is so many people in this world, who think no one loves them.  They go through life as their number one goal to find that love, that love that will quench that thirst, that completes them, that accepts them. I know what they are feeling because I was once where they were, thinking that a guy could give me all that I needed. But here's what we forget people are people, they fall, and get messy, and fail us, and break our hearts. But their is One that will never fail us, never leave, and will always love us, no matter how messy out life gets, His name is Jesus Christ!

 So, my prayer is that Jesus, I am Your servant, my hope is to become more and more like you, through mistakes and the messiness of my life. Please, give me your eyes, Jesus. Show me where to go when I can't see it myself, lead me in Your ways, and keep me on Your path. I need You desperately everyday. You are my rock and my number one. I will follow You all the days of my life, and I know it won't be easy, but Lord, I couldn't imagine it without You. Your grace, love, peace, joy, goodness. I couldn't even try, for I would fail. I wish I could show every single person how much they are loved, but I am just a person like them, so I need You, only You can show them, not me. I just play the background, just another tool in the tool box. And what a privilege it is to work beside the KING OF KINGS AND LORD OF LORDS! I am amazed that you even chose me! Thank you